Kanai's First Day Of School

Kanai started school on Sept 5th.

It's been a beautiful experience being a part of Kanai's separation ritual at his new school. His first days are spent with me sitting nearby, reading and writing, and occasionally answering his calls or going near to see how his teachers are working with him or how he's playing with his new friends. It allows both Kanai and me to feel safe separating from each other.

So often at schools, you drop the kids off at the door, kicking and screaming. We tried that route with him at a different school, and it was hard for all of us. We didn't know the people we were leaving him with, even though it was a well-known, highly recommended school. He spent three days in a trial summer school, and we immediately took him out. He didn't even want to hear the word school after that.

However, he was very excited to go on his first school day. He had the opportunity to go to some of the events and picnics and meet his teachers and some kids in his little nursery. So he warmed up to everyone before he arrived. We also spent a few mornings before doing test runs, pretending we were getting ready for school.

Day one came, and he was a fish in water.

Watching Kanai in school with his teachers and new friends is a deep study in slowing down. Not defining what things are so quickly. Allowing Kanai to decide for himself what something is. Unless it's unsafe, they allow for longer and deeper communication.

Kanai would snatch something from another child, and the teacher would say... Oh, Kanai, it looks like you want the same toy as Simon. Simon, are you finished with that? No?

Kanai, it looks like Simon isn't finished yet. Simon, can Kanai play with it after you're done?

Simon said ok, and Kanai said ok.. and he's on to the next toy. Just slowing down and adding more communication between them.

So often, it felt like watching Jedi masters redirect and clarify energy. Creating pathways of energy that seemed to be not available previously. Instead of forcing him down an already-prepared path, I am curious about who Kanai is. The type of school I wish I went to. I am grateful to offer that to him and get him a powerful start in life.

There were a few moments when I forgot that any "serious adults" were present. The adults so easily because joyful kids ready to play hide and seek and hide behind a tree with their knees and hair sticking out, obvious to the one searching. I had a moment where I broke down and I was concerned that nobody would find where the teacher was hiding. I might have to help them out!

The first day, I stayed from 9 to 3 and took a 1-hour break. They made sure I let Kanai know I was leaving. Even when I went to the bathroom. On the second day, I left for more extended periods. The first time I left on the second day was for an hour and a half. I came back and announced myself to Kanai; he looked at me and looked at his friends... And ran off with them. It never felt so good to be ignored.

I was impressed by Kanai's ability to join the different segments of the day. Morning meeting time. Lunchtime. The different activities they brought out. They would announce it, and he would walk over and take his seat. This new side of him hasn't been fully revealed to me, unveiling right before my eyes. Morning meeting time! Kanai, what's your plan for the day? He would respond clearly... "I plan to ride bikes and play basketball."

He also had a few deep connections he made and was always very close to a few kids. Today, at the end of his second day, his new friend AnaLise wanted to leave school with Kanai. So she and her mom waited for us to leave the school. It was super adorable.

While observing over these two days, It felt like I was watching an actual toddler TV show. It is not one of those shows that have elements of acting or high squeaky voices of adults making a show of playtime. It was two and three year olds relating. Primal, direct, true. With genius child educators guiding their gradual unfolding. If I could slow down enough in my mind and body, I found myself accessing one of the most entertaining shows on earth.

This whole month is my time alone with Kanai, supporting his transition into school as they requested that, as much as possible, only one parent be with him. So I've paused most of my life (except for my Unravel sessions on Wednesdays 😜, which is also the day he has off from school) to be with him, his school, and his teachers. While Momma gets to be home resting, rejuvenating, making money, and taking a much-needed breather from her high energy, “always on,” little boy.

I go back to school with Kanai on Monday for day 3. The teachers said he looked like he was doing well and that I could be away longer. It seems he has already bonded and is ready to be without me for the full day. However, I will still stick around to learn a thing or two by observing these geniuses at work and play. I'm learning tools to better communicate with him, and other relationships in my life. Also learning more ways to communicate with my own inner little one with compassion, patience, and slowing down to really see the pathway forward.

With Love

Sri Kala